Saturday, September 10, 2005

We're all gonna die!

In America, capitalism is king. What that really means is that commerce is generally driven by the law of supply and demand. Without getting technical, I'll just say that when supply is abundant or demand is low, price is usually low. When supply is tightened or demand is increased - well, sheer panic ensues.

People start filling up their cars seven times a day, so that when the world's supply of gas runs out at 5:00 p.m. they will have that much more gas and be able to drive for two more gallon's worth of miles before their automobile becomes obsolete, and they are forced to resort to travel by foot.

People start sending emails:
"Have you heard? Gas is running out."
"There is no more gas...ever."
"We'll have to use horse and buggy from now on."
"Fill up now, while you still can!"

Now what's really happening here is a public-generated shortage. There really is no shortage of gas. However, the nervous banter about gas around the water cooler forces everybody to fill up every chance they get. With everyone keeping a full tank of gas, rather than filling up only when they need it, an actual shortage of gas is generated.

It's a weird social phenomenon. But it's like trying to fall asleep. The more you think about falling asleep, the more wide awake you become. The more you talk about the gas shortage, the worse it gets.

The gas companies and pump stations LOVE this. Prices sky-rocket because gas is "scarce" - at least in the eyes of the public, and that is all it takes. Sometimes perception becomes reality.

National DO-NOT-BUY-GAS-DAY
Then I get an email forwarded to me. It's been forwarded by dozens of people before it makes it's way to me. Apparently, some genius somewhere at the university of something, determined that if everyone in America refuses to buy gas, on "Do-not-buy-gas Day" the gas companies and pump stations will FEAR the purchasing power of the public rather than take advantage of it. And suddenly...the world will be a perfect place.

I don't mean to be a pessimist, but well I'm a pessimist. I just isn't feasible. Let's see: we'd just have to stop all the farm equipment that produces the food we eat, and then stop all the trucks that deliver our groceries. Oh, and the airlines will of course get the day off. And...no Nascar this Sunday (Gasp!) Suddenly the world comes to a crashing halt that not even Gandhi, John Lennon, or Michael Jackson can stop.

Hey, and maybe if we get all the children in the world to clap their tiny hands together at the same time -- we can have world peace.

5 comments:

PureDesign said...

I think if all the little children clapped there tiny hands together at the same time there'd be a huge earthquake that would thus result of the departure of California, which would inturn like you stated make the world a far far better place.

Rand said...

Hmm...plastic shoes...there is something...so familiar about...plastic shoes...

Anyway, supply and demand is tough sometimes, especially with gas. You know, some times it just feels good to "payless."

Rand said...

Coach Z, is that you?

Rand said...

Actually, No Howard Brinick. On the contrary, I think your site sucks. Yeah sucks.

Moreover, it has nothing to do with MY site, which begs the question: "Why are you vomiting your garbage dating service on my blog?"

Whoa...that just about got out of hand. Sorry everyone. But, Howard, seriously, your site still sucks.

PureDesign said...

Yeah Howard, get a life, or better yet get a life that doesn't involve vomiting your garbage sites onto my friend or my blog....

PUNK!